An open letter to my two head lecturers

Dear peter and Suzi

Today you called me, marc and Robert into your office and queried us RE: the emails we sent for the KeySkills lesson.

we had to send emails to each other asking for links to help us make a newsletter. To perk up a boring task we jazzed up our emails. Below is the email I printed and put in my KeySkills folder.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
SOLICITATIONS!!

Dear sir the festive season is nigh up on us and I was told that you may have some information that may be useful to my en devours.

Please send this info post-haste and I will peruse it over warm brandy, cigars and indeed a mustache.

One thousand thanks.

Lord smithly palmerson
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

so I got called into your office today peter due to this email.

You then proceeded to pretty much judge me as a liar just because your office staff didn’t pass on the message I was ill .

You then called me Disgraceful, Disgusting, Vile and Rude.

I may not be the best student, I might talk in lesson and yes I do OF COURSE swear I’m seventeen what do you expect.

But to make these statements over what appears to be a misunderstanding.

This email had no ulterior motive and certainly never meant to offend ANYONE, infact I insisted upon resending a different email due to me judging the original as inappropriate for college.

I like to talk and use college as an opportunity to socialise but I achieved 2 points from Distinction star last year. I like to think I balance college and socializing at an acceptable medium and have worked hard both in and out of college for solid two years to achieve the best I could under many difficult circumstances caused by lecturers.

Singling me and my friends out in a large disruptive class is unprofessional and I find slightly mean. I will not change the way I act as it has not stopped me in the past.

Yours sincerely but truthfully
Samuel